Tricking Naraku
by imanewme
Summary: Evil Naraku plots to confuse the IY gang into killing each other. This is a take on a "Freaky Friday" theme.


Prov #5 Theme: Freaky Friday  
Title: Tricking Naraku  
Author: Imanewme  
Genre: Adventure?  
Word count: 2081  
Rating: T  
Warnings: None  
AU/Canon: Cannon  
Theme: Freaky Friday

Written for Inuyasha Comedy join the fun!

_Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha. I just like to play with the characters._

Night fell over Feudal Era Japan and Naraku smiled with evil intent. If the old witch's potion worked the way he wanted it to, it was going to be a very good Friday indeed.

Handing the small bags of powder to the shamiyoso. "Fly quickly, my minions, and remember your targets." Nodding quickly in Kanna's direction he smiled again. "I'll be watching."

The poison bees flew quickly into the night and found the camp where Inuyasha and his friends were bedding down. Two bees hung in the air over each sleeper. One held a tiny pouch of powder over the sleeper, and the other used its sharp stinger to cut the bottom out of the pouch, releasing the sparkling dust into his or her face. Light coughs could be heard around the campfire, and Kirrara sneezed, but no one woke. Quickly the bees flew into the night as Naraku peered into Kanna's mirror in anticipation.

"_Anyone breathing in this potion will change bodies with the first person he or she sees," _ the old witch had promised. Naraku was counting on it.

Inuyasha was the first to wake. Rolling over and stretching, he opened his eyes and looked over at Miroku. An odd swirling noise sounded in his ears. Miroku, feeling the magical tug on his person, sat up and looked at Inuyasha, transfixed. He blinked once, twice, and the third time he blinked he could not believe his eyes. He was looking at his twin!

"Inuyasha!" Miroku called out, but the voice was not his own. Looking down at his own hands, he saw the claws and the red kimono stretched over his arms. Wildly he looked up again to see himself doing the same. His double had leaped to the ground and was pulling on his hair and robes.

"What is the meaning of this!" Inuyasha turned Miroku cried. "I feel so weak," he muttered then roared in surprise when he looked at his double. "And who the fuck are you, imposter?"

"Imposter?" Miroku's sputtered. "Inuyasha, there's some dark magic afoot. It looks like we've traded bodies."

Their conversation was interrupted by piercing screams. The rest of the camp was in total chaos. Shippo was holding his tail with wide scared eyes. Kagome had her hands folded over her midsection and looked decidedly embarrassed. Sango had a huge grin on her face and was stretching out her arms before her while Kirrara stumbled around in circles and mewled pitifully.

Miroku was the first to take charge. "Everybody remain calm! We've been bewitched!"

All the camp fell silent and stared at Inuyasha's body in shock.

"Uh, Inuyasha, what are you doing with Miroku's staff?" Shippo looked decidedly worried. "And Miroku, why are you clutching tessiga? Did it happen to you, too?"

"I think we all need to sit down and figure this out," Miroku said. "you see, Inuyasha and I have been swapped somehow. I'm in Inuyasha's body, and he's in mine. Come on, let's sit down."

Everyone sat in a circle and tried to calm down. Kirrara's form was having the most trouble. She was mewling and crying until Sango's voice spoke up, "Oh get a grip, bitch, it's not THAT bad."

"Sango," Inuyasha's body said, "Who's in Sango's body?"

"I'm Kirrara," she said, and jumping up and stretching she smiled a wicked smile, "it's so nice to finally be heard. All the time I'm listening to you guys yap and yap and generally you leave me to my own devices. I'm finally able to speak my mind and I'll tell you what you crazy twits, won't any of you get your head out of your asses and get laid already? I mean, jeez.. the sexual tension in this group reaks!"

Kirrara's body mewled. "And who has your body, Kirrara?" Inuyasha's body looked at Sango's body intently. Sango's body giggled. "It's Sango, and let me tell you, she isn't adjusting well at all." Kirrara's body shook and gave Sango's body a low growl. "Put a sock in it, Sango," Sango's body admonished Kirrara's body. "I'm going to enjoy this as long as it lasts."

Inuyasha's body spoke again. "Can you translate for us Kirrara?" his eyes trained on the slayers body.

"I can, but I assure you it's not flattering," Sango's body peeled into laugher. "I had no idea my mistress was so creative." Sango's body strode over to Miroku's body. With a big smile, Sango's hands ran through Miroku's hair and she leaned down and planted a big kiss on the monk's face.

Miroku's body jumped up and slapped Sango's face. "What the fuck was that, Kirrara?" Inuyasha was horrified. Kirrara smiled to herself, happy to have Sango's voice at her command. "If Miroku and Inuyasha have swapped bodies then you must be Inuyasha. I've been dying to tell you how sexy you are, Inuyasha."

Miroku's body tensed and Inuyasha blushed from behind the monks face. "Then why aren't you kissin' him you dumb broad," Miroku's body pointed over at Inuyasha. "He's the one with my body, ya know."

"mmmm…." Kirrara purred, "but I like it rough, tough guy, and you've got the attitude to make me scream," Kirrara slid Sango's hands down Sango's taught body. "I think we should find a meadow right now, as a matter of fact."

Kirrara's' body transformed into her larger form, snarling. Sango's body smiled at her. "It's only his body, darling, I'll bring it back in one piece."

Inuyasha's body leaped to his feet. "Whoah whoah, whoah, no one's seducing anyone under these conditions," Miroku struggled for words. "We're not done figuring out who's who here anyway. Okay… let's do a role call. When I call your name, no matter whose body you're in raise your hand or growl okay?"

The group quieted down. Apparently it was very shocking to see Inuyasha's body spout such calm logic. Sango's body walked back to her original spot and sat down again.

"Okay. I'm Miroku," Inuyahsa's body raised his hand. "Inuyasha?" Miroku's body raised his hand. "Sango?" A low growl emerged from Kirrara's throat. "Kirrara?" Sango's hand raised in the air proudly. "Shippo?" Kagome's hand shyly raised. "and Kagome." Shippo raised a stubby paw.

Kagome's voice was the first to speak after the head count. "Kagome," she looked at Shippo pointedly, "Don't you ever eat? I'm hungry!"

Shippo placed his hands on his hips and pouted. "Hey, A girl's got to keep her figure, ya know. Besides, what about you?" Shippo's body licked his lips. "What the hell did you eat last night? It's all up in your teeth."

From a dark cave miles away Naraku smiled and chuckled. His plan was working nicely. "Before the day is out, " he muttered, "surely they'll kill each other."

Miroku's body lept up. "So, Miroku, what the hell do we do?"

The others looked to Inuyasha's body for reassurance. Inuyasha's body sighed. "We get help."

"From who?" all the others muttered in unison.

Inuyasha's body sighed again. "I don't know. Does anyone have any ideas?"

Shippo's voice spoke up. "There's always Kaede."

Miroku's body tensed. "Keh" he said, "She may be a miko, but I don't think this brand of magic is under the miko's jurisdiction."

"It's worth a try though," Inuyasha's voice was thoughtful. "But we're miles away from there."

"Well it's time we got walking, then, Monk." Miroku's body 'keh'd' again. "Let's just hope we don't get into any trouble along the way."

Naraku laughed darkly into Kanna's mirror. "Hope all you want, Inuyasha," he hissed. "Kagura!" Naraku snapped his fingers. "Go to them at once. Threaten them but do not kill them. Provoke them however you please."

"Yes Naraku." Kaugra's eyes filled with mirth. It was a rare day Naraku gave her freedom to act as she pleased with the group. Lighting on her magic feather, she flew out to meet the group head on.

It was mid day and the group stopped to rest at a clear cold stream. Shippo's body was weary, as Kagome was not accustomed to short steps. Kagome's body was tired, too, as Shippo wasn't used to such long legs. Kirrara's body huffed and mewled the entire way while Sango's body laughed occasionally. Only Inuyasha and Miroku seemed to be adjusting.

An awkward silence had fallen over the group and they sat quietly as Shippo's body dug through Kagome's backpack and produced some snacks. "Come on, Shippo," Shippo's voice called out to Kagome's body. "Let's go fill these bottles with water."

Cackles rang out from overhead. Miroku's body jumped up in anger. "Kagura!" he called out. "We don't care to fuck with you today, windbag!" Miroku's voice bit out.

Kaugra laughed again. "Such words from a holy man," she taunted.

Miroku's body drew tessiaga, but it remained lifeless in his hand. "Miroku!" Miroku's body called to Inuyasha's, "catch!"

Miroku's body tossed tessiaga to Inuyasha's body. Miroku's hand grasped tessiaga and it sprang into life.

"Just as I thought," Miroku's voice shook. "Forgive me for this, Miroku." Inuhasha shook as he prepared to use Miroku's wind tunnel.

"No, Inuyasha, wait!" Shippo's voice rang out, "Poison bees!"

"Ugh," Miroku's body grunted. "Useless! Miroku, help us!"

Meanwhile Kagome's form drew her arrow, but Shippo knew nothing of archery and the arrow flew wildly, narrowly missing Sango's body.

"Hey, you whore, watch where you're pointing that thing!" Sango's body lunged at Kagome's.

"Foxfire!" Kagome's voice rang out, but of course, nothing happened.

Inuyasha's form was having troubles as well, for as tessiaga sprung to life in his hands, Miroku did not know how to control it. Sensing his ineptness, he tossed it aside. Kirrara's body leapt at the wind sorcerer, but, since Sango knew nothing of the technicalities of flight she spun wildly out of control.

Kaugra laughed at the scene unfolding before her. It took little effort to thwart their attacks. "You're more of a danger to yourself than you are to me!" she cackled. "Pathetic!" She would have enjoyed the show indefinitely, but unfortunately Naraku's voice was calling her back to his lair.

"I know all I need to know," Naraku purred, "Come home, Kaugra."

Kaugra eyes flashed in anger and she cursed Naraku under her breath. "Call on me when you can put up a real fight." She fumed and flew away into the distance.

Back in Naraku's lair, Naraku chuckled with pride. If things kept up like this, the group surely would kill each other, either out of anger or from sheer ineptitude. He wouldn't have to get his hands dirty after all.

Meanwhile the group had fallen into total chaos.

"What were you trying to do back there, kill me?" Sango's voice fumed as she pointed at Kagome accusingly. "You stupid little fox, did you really think you could shoot that thing?"

"Stupid fox!" Kagome's voice retorted, "You're the idiot who didn't even try to help us! At least I tried to do something." Kirrara's voice snarled in agreement.

"Oh don't you start," Sango's voice was harsh. "You can't fly worth shit, slayer."

Kirrara's growl was enough for all present to know her answer.

Inuyasha's body settled a hand on Miroku's body's shoulder. "Thank you, Inuyasha, for not poisoning me back there."

"Keh," Miroku's body replied. "I need to teach you some swordplay, monk."

"At least we aren't fighting each other like Sango and Kirrara," Inuyasha's voice remarked.

"I heard that!" Sango's voice rang out and Kirrara's body snarled.

"At least they agree about something," Shippo's voice said, shaking his head softly.

"Look, it's late, let's just set camp here and get some rest," Shippo's hands rested on his hips. "It has been a long day."

The group set up camp in silence, each wondering just how long they would have to endure this curse. Naraku watched as each member of the group fell asleep one by one. What he didn't know was that someone else was watching the group with glee.

The old witch snickered. "Ate, you've outdone yourself this time," She snickered. "But I grow tired of this show." Silently she blew blue smoke into the wind. It settled over the camp silently, and small balls of light emerged from each body and settled into its owner's true form.

"Naraku's going to be angry, Ate." Discordia admonished her sister.

"No worries," Ate responded. "Our father outranks him anyway."

Miles away Naraku roared in anger as he watched the souls take up their proper places through the portal of Kanna's mirror. "Damned foreign witch!" he howled, "Traitor!"


End file.
